All Eyes on RFK Jr. After Probe Begins Into Dolphin’s ‘Butchered’ Corpse

A dolphin’s butchered corpse was found on a New Jersey seaside final week, so, naturally, the web is now exploding with jokes about flop presidential candidate and MAGA convert Robert F. Kennedy Jr. being the offender.

Should you recall, Kennedy’s dismal political marketing campaign was principally only a long string of scandals, with a number of involving useless and mutilated animals. First he was accused of eating a dog. Then he admitted that in 2014 he’d dumped a bear cub carcass in Central Park. At one level, he bragged about having a freezer full of roadkill in his home. Then, in August, he was federally investigated after it got here to gentle that he’d cut a whale’s head off with a chainsaw. Understandably, the current look of a useless, mangled animal has the web turning an accusatory eye to the Kennedy scion.

The Marine Mammal Stranding Heart, a Jersey-based non-profit devoted to the rescue, rehabilitation, and launch of distressed native marine mammals and turtles, stated in a press release Friday {that a} dolphin’s “butchered” physique had been found on a seaside in Allenhurst, New Jersey.

“The animal’s flesh had been utterly eliminated with clear cuts from a pointy instrument, leaving solely the top, dorsal fin and flukes,” an announcement reads. “The animal’s organs, aside from the guts and lungs, had been eliminated.”

The evening earlier than the animal was found, a reside dolphin was noticed within the surf not distant, MMSC stated, whereas noting that it’s unclear whether or not this was the identical animal. The Nationwide Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration Workplace of Regulation Enforcement is now investigating the demise, the MMSC stated.

These questioning concerning the Jack-the-Ripper-type maniac who stole the aquatic mammal’s innards wasted no time in pointing the finger (if solely jokingly) at RFK. Sure, the tweets to this point have been good: “Aw shit I didn’t understand RFK got here to city,” said one smart-ass on X. One other particular person, who additionally shared the story on the platform, stated: “I’m guessing RFK Fr. sorted an alibi already.” Yet one more poster quipped that Trump had formally “misplaced the dolphin vote.” 

There is a non-zero probability that this was RFK doing a dolphin sacrifice forward of the election pic.twitter.com/qL1roCqzMp

— Fifty Shades of Whey (@davenewworld_2) November 5, 2024

To our information, Kennedy had nothing to do with the dolphin’s demise, although it might be nice if he issued an alibi for Friday evening so we all know for certain.

Total, the MAGA-verse doesn’t have an important observe report with regards to animal welfare. Certain, for the previous week, rightwing influencers have been expressing outrage over the euthanization of a New York squirrel, however the main motive for his or her anger appears to be authorities overreach, not a woodland creature’s well-being. No, for essentially the most half, Trump’s allies appear to be hounded by unusual allegations involving animals.

Working example: Kevin Roberts, the president of the Heritage Basis (and, thus, one of many key proponents of the dystopian Project 2025) was accused of bragging about killing a dog with a shovel (Roberts has denied this). In an upcoming ebook, Roberts additionally apparently complained that the existence of dog parks was an instance of the creep of “antifamily tradition.” JD Vance, Trump’s operating mate, has additionally been accused (principally jokingly) of liking dolphin porn.

In fact, there’s extra at stake for the animal kingdom this election than canine parks and dolphin porn. Trump, whose first administration was not identified for being significantly environmentally pleasant, has allies who’ve advocated for the gutting of the Endangered Species Act. In addition they need to open up long-protected nationwide parks for mining and federal lands for urban development. It’s unlikely that the pure world will profit a lot if he will get into workplace once more.